I was today-years-old when i found out you could make blogs on this forum. even though i don't think anybody is going to read these! but thats okay.

I guess I'll start by going over the goings-ons of this past week.

i was very sick this past month, i had all the textbook symptoms pf COVID-19 but can't tell you for sure because i never went to the hospital to get tested. whatever the hell it was, i can tell you id never had anything like it before, and it hurt like hell. i've had a severe case of pneumonia before, where i was coughing up blood and nearly ended up in the hospital, and this wasn't even as severe as that, but somehow worse??? it feels like, suffocating in a room full of air, like a gorillas sitting on your chest. with normal pneumonia its just, the flu, and nonstop coughing, and you're coughing up mucus and other nasties, and that also hurts like hell, but its coming up. with this you could hear it all in my chest when i breathed, but when i would cough, it was dry, and rattled my whole chest, and nothing ever came up. The crap just kept building up in my chest until i couldn't breathe, and i did all these desperate measures to try to clear my airways to try to get it out, because i knew if i didn't, id need to go to the hospital, and we cant afford a hospital bill. it was a few weeks of hell, but i think ive finally shaken it off. the cough still shows up every now and then, and the pressure in my chest is still there, but i think it just kind of really f*cked me up and ive been trying to do breathing exercises to be able to expand my lungs fully again.

what i did was go through a crap ton of congestion medication and i got a medicated air humidifier kit, and those things combined helped me cough it up a little bit, but still those things barely did much at all. it was just barely enough to keep me breathing without passing out. in hindsight i probably should have gone to the hospital anyway LOL...it was really bad. but look! here i am, not dead! im sort of ok now! huzzah.

my brother's starting homeschooling too, we live in the middle of nowhere in a food desert so what grocery stores we have around are always sold out out of everything, the local community is kind of relying on the farmers for eggs and meat, and we have food drives to donate canned foods for people who have nothing at all. my sisters been helping us find groceries and slipping the stuff we need past the door, out of arm's reach.

meanwhile, ive been going absolutely nuts barricaded in my room!

i wish i could tell you what i was doing while i was actually sick too, but i honestly don't remember. i was pretty miserable and think i just layed around a lot, like, dying and stuff. i think id occasionally log onto tumblr from my phone and gripe "uhhhhghhhghh i'm dyinngg" and logging out and disappearing for a week hahaha

but currently, ive been practicing guitar a bit, someone stole some of my tabs and reposted them on songster or whatever that site is called, which im not too peachy about.

(sorry i cant embed this one, but,)

SO much stardew valley. so much. i binged that for a week or so, downloaded all the mods i could.

i married shane, like i do every time, because idk, every time i see him at the back of that saloon looking like the pathetic POS he is, i can't help but want to help him. he reminds me a lot of myself, and idk, his arc kind of makes me hope the same thing will happen to me some day. how dumb is that! also he loves chickens and hot peppers as much as me, heheh

then, when i got bored with that, i moved on to species ALRE, a game i got myself for my birthday. rip to everyone else who have birthdays during the pandemic LOL. everything physical is overpriced, like, everything, even stuff you can't think would benefit in any way by raising prices during a pandemic. but at least steam games are there for you, their price tags don't go up.

BTW, species ALRE is this silly evolutionary game where you observe an environment of a specimen that will evolve naturally by survival of the fittest, the genetic mutations that benefit better in it's environment surviving over others that don't, and it ends up in some truly HORRIFIC abominations.

an absolutely cursed game, i love it.

now, my CURRENT obsession, is python. I built myself a bot that bullies me into doing stuff because uh, im like, severely depressed and forget to take care of myself or do things i enjoy.

nobodies probably noticed, but i disappeared from here for a long time, and my bot is the one that told me to come back here for like, idk, social interaction stuff,, it also tells me to drink water, reminds me to eat, (ive packed on a few pounds from the skin and bones i was before, thats healthy, right? oof) it reminds me to play games i used to enjoy..gives me random anime and shows to watch...when nobody cares about you, build something that does, i guess.

on the same sort of topic, ive built a generator thats kind of like a dungeons and dragons assistant, that makes npcs and stuff for you. that's pretty nifty! right?

ive also been experimenting with making text adventure games, but i doubt id ever get invested enough to do a project that big, but it's always nice to learn how to do things just to say you could.

i also, ALSO, learned how to host my own web server on my computer using python, which i explained how you can do yourself on my blog here. (just don't do that planning to do it long term, your internet provider will probably get mad. it's also not safe or secure. just like, do it to temporarily share files with friends.)

if you want to host longterm without paying someone to host for you or without buying a business package from your provider, look up Beaker Browser which is another thing im a total huge nerd about. Peer2peer web hosting, whaaat! if you get into that (one of us, one of us,) you can find my own dat link here: dat://97d5c5a9b56da6273edada84d6f1c7b86d4a1b529f381bdcec8fd9c0806ef615/ (if im actually online at the time, anyways.)

seriously look up beaker browser and the dat protocol, they're really cool.

AND i'm also (sorry, this is the last one) starting the garden this year. It's been bigger every year, so hopefully this'll be a good one. i am worried about my health though, i'm worried i wont be able to upkeep it this year as well as i used to, but, i'm going to try i think.

we've got hot peppers, we've got zucchinis, we've got tomatoes, butternut squash! i can't wait to get me some fried zucchini and pickle my own jalapenos. i love some pickled jalapenos on a cheese and egg sandwich with toasted bread.

aish, i lied. i also started a sourdough starter that ive been baking with, since the stores don't usually have any yeast these days. yall should look into learning how to maintain those, it's wild yeast that you just get out of the thin air to cook with. it's like a pet!

anyway that's how i'm doing...i'm sort of doing, as opposed to like, not doing, like i usually do,

anime series ive been binging during all this, too:

• Nisekoi
• Itai no wa Iya nano de Bougyoryoku ni Kyokufuri Shitai to Omoimasu.

happy pandemic everyone loll. see you some other time. or maybe i wont, ah

oh, and if anybody has any cool names for my bot, that would be cool. i feel weird just saying "my bot" when talking about it.

maybe some day ill use this feature to post about something relevant. sorry if this is all over the place, i have ADHD and have trouble trying to articulate literally any coherent thought