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Otaku

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Blog Entries posted by Otaku

  1. Otaku

    hai hai minasama! I'm not gone for good sort of?

    By Otaku,


    Entry 4 - Okay so... I'm sort of here?
    so heyo anime fans and otakus its me Otaku. i have not posted for a while because I've been... actually there is no excuse I've been exploreing diffrent places on the net and I've found a community.  This community i will not share the name of due to it being similar to 4chan and i don't want to get banned for that.
    Anyways i will still post on here but not as much or maybe not at all (sorry about the contradictory sentences) 
    This website has a great community and I'm glad you all welcomed me. I dunno maybe i will continue to use both now this has been unbanned from my assigned laptop. 
     
    I know i said i was back in February and well i lied ima be honest i dunno if ill stay for that long i cant predict future me, but i have gotten better I've been going to therapy and have been on something that makes me feel better about myself so i am struggling still but with different issues.  like i cant seem to socially interact with my peers or i cant seem to leave the house unless one of my friends drag me out to "hang out" so i have to appear normal. 
     
    but skools been fine i started this year the academics is easy im attempting to transfer to higher level classes at the moment, i hate my classmates. 
     
    Summer was fun i went to metrocon and attended pannel rooms and got some kool merch. 
     
    dunno what else to say but ill try to be more active 

  2. Otaku

    A lot has happened and I know I haven't posted. :,)

    By Otaku,


    Entry 13 - Sorry... a lot has happened... so here's an update?
    Hello, Anime Loves and Otakus, I did not fall off the face of the earth but a lot has happened since January. I love this community but I was not doing well and am still in the middle of it so I'll try to explain and maybe tell you guys the good things about what's happening right now. 
    So After the winter holiday, it was okay, for some reason my mother was like no you're not going to get your driver's license, and since you talked back to me I'm going to make your life a living hell. I don't like to mention her because she's horrible. She first put me on house arrest like no joke I'm not joking I'm only allowed to go to school and they bring me wherever they go like I'm a little dog. No, it wasn't enough she chose to take away all of my privileges that she thinks is "earned".
    Here's a list, they hopefully last until 02/23 but she said she can do what she wants: 
    No conversing or hanging out with your friends 
    No devices or tv
    No phone calls
    No being home alone 
    There is some more but I forget. Keep in mind these all started because she felt like it. My parents have been divorced since I was 2 but they are on really bad terms mainly due to my father's mistakes and my mother's manipulative tendencies. This causes some friction between all 3 of us mainly because my mother treats me the same way she treated my dad. I'm not saying my mother is bad all the time just most of the time which has given me a complex and some anger issues. She likes to play favorites a lot by favoring my little sister and bidding my stepfather against me when she doesn't like what I'm doing. 
    The funny thing is they don't have anything planned for me only my father does he set me up for a good future while my mother wants me to stay with her and do house projects, run errands, and watch my little sister. All saying I'll let you live here for free and if you go to school (not saying she will pay for it) I'll pay your car bills. While on the other hand, my dad has everything set up teaching skills and helping me study to make sure I leave this place and have a good life. 
    On that note, I have not been doing well and my mother seems to think for some reason it's not an issue for she's pretending to ignore it. She keeps egging me on by doing little things that she knows piss me off. All she's doing is "trying" to fix my other health issues which is not even an issue in my opinion. I have a skin condition and I have since I was little. We are doing a treatment that works but she wants me on all these natural supplements that don't even work. 
    Okay now on to the good!
    I might be able to obtain a girlfriend but I don't know, how to navigate that. You see I've always been shy with girls and I have had bad past experiences. I'm kinda enjoying paling around with my friends but I'm also spontaneous and like to do things on a whim. What if she wants more than I can give? I don't want to make banana bread! What if we have to hold hands and be all kissy? Okay, I know I sound like a child but I'm all so dFDFGDFGDfgfdGDFgdffg, you know? 
    On another note, I've got into punk and have been listening to the Sex Pistols for about a year now, of recent I got into Dead Kennedys, Vicous White Kids, Dead Boys, and Sham 69.  I'm also watching documentaries on the Sex Pistols and Sid Vicous. 
    I went to a couple more conventions and got some cool stuff like DVDs and manga. I recently got into reading High School DxD on one of my friend's recommendations its pretty good. 
    Thanks for reading see you guys in the next one. I promise to try to get back online more its a bit hard right now.
     
     I'M BACK FOR REALl!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  3. Otaku

    Hello I'm kinda back but not really

    By Otaku,


    Entry 12 - Strange break... I'm kinda back
    Hello, anime loves and otakus today's topic is burnout and all that, take care of yourselves. Idk if I should be writing about this I want to be like hey I'm okay just tired you know. 
    So as you might have known or noticed I have been slightly or drastically less active at the start of my holiday break which started on the 21 or something. I did post and respond in the forums for a bit but it was hard to keep up so I stopped I didn't go outside or talk to anybody for about the majority of the 2 weeks that we got off. Near the end of the break, I was forced to go out and some family came down to wish us a happy new year and holidays (Btw happy new year, I Can't believe it's 2025 it still feels like 2019). We have been back at school for about a week maybe a couple of days I'm not doing well at tracking the time right now. 
    Over break I just isolated myself by playing games, watching anime, and streamers to the point where I would stay up all night to finish an anime or continue my game I started to slowly forget to do important tasks and became sucked into the reality of my computer. I mostly stayed in sweatpants and a hoodie as well it was cold out but it never snowed or at least I never noticed it did.
    I don't think I have agoraphobia I just don't like to leave the house or being contained in a space with lots of people, cons are fun even though they are busy. I like to go and interact with the community. 
    So I'm currently struggling to connect with my peers and I suppose my friends. Not only that but I'm starting to get behind on my studying and school work not significantly but as I'm writing this at 3 in the morning I have 4 assignments not started all due by the end of the week (Dw I probably will get them done). My family is starting to get annoying again they said it's normal to be like this and I should go to social groups and get a job to help fix it (I don't think they get the point of why I'm struggling). What can you do at this point? Luckily none of my classmates has noticed or paid attention to me and I'm pretty sure my friends don't care. 
    Don't worry If you're taking this as me leaving or taking a break from the forums you are incorrect, I love the community and would love to keep interacting with you guys, and playing forum games is one of the joys of my day. I will not be responding or playing games as much until I get caught up with my work which should be maybe a couple of days or even a month. I still will be active on here just not as much. 
    Thanks for the support - Otaku 
     
     
  5. Otaku

    Tea trying + tea collection

    By Otaku,


    Entry 10 - tea part 1
    Hello fellow anime loves and otakus today we are looking at my tea collection, you can thank @Kirika_Madeleine for giving me the courage to share.
    A really important part of collecting anything is not about the quantity that you have it in but rather the care you put into it, I have found what works best for me to care for this collection is keeping it in a small basket with most of the items and ingredients I like to use to make my tea. 

    I like to keep it organized, by putting the tea in small containers with labels. Sometimes I don’t have the right container or space so it stays in the bags it comes in. The storage situation is temporary until I can afford to buy a shelf and nice glass bottles to store the teas in.
    The contents:

    The basket contains 5 different teas, and 2 seasonings. The more citrusy/fruity teas are Sinfully Cherry and ROYGBIV which have a green tea base. My middle ground tea which is slightly flowery and slightly warm is the Jasmine Pearls which are only green tea. My fully warm/festive teas are Warm Bread Pudding and Vanilla Pecan Oolong, which both have a base of black tea.
     
    brewing + tasting:

    I have a cup with a filter but the holes make the wet tea leaves seep through so I like to put a coffee filter full of leaves to help prevent the leaves from going into my mouth, but if you do do this be warned pour the hot water slowly because it takes longer for it to go through (I learned that the hard way by pouring boiling water on my self at one point).
    I tried the tea with different items plainly but I did add too many tea leaves the instructions call for 14grams but I used 28 whoops and it says to let steep for 5min, I let it steep for 3 min. The tea tastes good with cookies and fruit strips, but I think the fruit strips tastes better because it goes with the tart, fruity, flavor of the drink.
    The overall taste of the tea is very strong using a copious combination of fruits it is names after all the colours in the rainbow so it makes sense. The colour of the liquid its self is a deep purple but when swatched on the napkin is a light pinky purple. There is an overpowering taste of pomegranate in the tea mixed with some more sour elements.
    alight thank you 
     I was a little sick today so I over poured the tea, :’>
     
     
  6. Otaku

    Exams.... DFGJHDFVHDFVHDIVUHRDIVHVBVADVKJRNVL

    By Otaku,


    Entry 9 - Exams pt 1
    Hello my fellow anime loves and otakus welcome to my blog today we are going over the current reality: EXAMS. 
    So I've always studied and tried really hard to get good grades, I'm currently undergoing exams at my high school. I have never been above average but some how I got into some honors classes. Except maths I've never been good at maths or enjoyed doing maths, I'm currently in algebra because I never took it and they gave it to me and it's very hard especially the state questions (I got a 52% :,> I swear I studied I've been going to the library everyday, but the classwork is easy, I hope the state curves it because my class always fails these things) I also have a presentation for one of my other classes, we are like making a shark tank prestation ( I honestly don't know lol)
    Tomorrow I have my Spanish 2 exam I need to study for that too all I have been focusing on is maths. On Wednesday I have my reading comprehension exam. Thursday I have Biomed exam (I really need to study for that one too cells is quite difficult, ang they put me in honors for some reason) Friday is a chill day I guess (that's fine because I'm a chill dude) then we have winter holiday I'm so exited, and chrismas I guess, I put an electric kettle on my list.
    I'm really hoping to possibly finish up Katawa Shoujo and Lovely Complex over the break but I probably will not. It's getting colder and It's okay I mean I hope it snows but then again it has to get really cold for that. I might play Animal Crossing, and Roblox with my friends because we like to play those games together. I really wanted to go to Holiday Matsuri 2024 this year but it's too expensive, too far way, and not on our timeline.
    Oh well, I got some new tea's for my tea collection yesterday I got some from Tea and Spice Exchange: I got Sinful Cherry, a green tea base with rose and cherry very light flavor complex so if you like stronger teas its best to brew for longer it tastes very good with some flowery pastry prefect for spring, that's all I gathered on the flavor profile, I have not tried it iced yet. I also got ROYGBIV with looks to be a very fruity tea also with a green tea base I have not tired it yet but soon I will. 
    I also started working on a big art project its a pencil sketch on 6 pieces of blue card stock. 
    I am very exited for the upcoming break and looking forward to exams being over, I already failed one lets hope for anything above a 70%. Thanks for reading and see you in the next one, let me know if you would like a post about my tea collection.
    Exams got me feelin the burn especially when I see those scores.
  7. Otaku

    Day in My Boring Life

    By Otaku,


    Entry 8 - Day in the Life
    Today I woke up and fell asleep from the times 4:59-5:33 I finally woke up at 5:34 after my final alarm played. I got dressed, made breakfast and hot coca, and watched Ongiri because I had time before my bus. I got on the bus. I arrived at school to listen to music in the overcrowded cafeteria.
    After I went to my classes and did my homework (I finished it all before lunch) I said hi to my "friends". I skipped lunch to sit in the library. After lunch I went to my classes. During those classes my friends called me names and yelled at me lol. They said the way I was studying for exams was stupid.
    After school I went to a study meeting after school, and after that I went to the dentist. When I got home studied for the exam. I roller skated around my room blaring music out of a speaker with neon lighting. I did laundry. And I probably went to bed around 11. 
     waking up at 5am be like lol
  8. Otaku

    We are back at school.... yeah... ..break was fun!

    By Otaku,


    Entry 7 - back at school...
    Hello anime loves and otakus welcome back today we are talking about what I did over the break and school. 
    Break: Break was fun I stayed inside watching twitch streamers and anime. I also played Katawa Shoujo I master all of the roots on act 1 with all the buttons clicked and made it to lily and emi's second act ending, I'm currently working on hanako's second act end. I also went to an anime convention, it was a lot of people and very loud but I did buy some cool things like some old dvds for my dvd player; I got "Sakura Cardcaptor the final judgment", A random Sailor Moon one (I forget the name) : I have never since one like it (maybe because I did not search but still),  I also got "Shuffle" the 4th one apparently. I also bought a PASWG sticker and a dice. My friends bought a tail (Don't ask they said and I quote "I'm not a furry it was just soft." (nothing wrong with furries) my other friend bought a mask and a plushie. 
    The break was so pleasant now I'm back at school  
    But now I'm struggling again especially with my friends and the appending exams.  
    Today I had to do a presentation in front of the whole class whilst being graded on our presentation skills and it will effect the whole group grade. I'm honestly thinks of doing the rest of my school years next year online. But the point is school is very hard because some of my teachers don't teach us. 
    Other than then learning part my friends are very hard to be around, they keep making fun of me and its making me feel really bad about myself, I mean they be mena then not its very hard to figure out what they are feeling or doing. 
    But anyway thanks for reading! 
    Me studying, I don't have a lot of self control lol
  9. Otaku

    I'm off for break X3 (from school)

    By Otaku,


    Entry 6 - Thanksgiving Break
    Hello Anime Loves and Otakus. I'm off for Thanksgiving! And all I'm gonna do over the break is watch anime and chill. I might buy a Christmas tree and decorate it because going up to the attic to grab one is a lot of work. I'm choose not to go to one of those big family advents because I'm tired of them asking questions so I will most likely just end up spending it with my father. 
    These are mostly my plans for the break: 
     
  10. Otaku

    My experience going skating

    By Otaku,


    Entry 5 - Ice skating
    Hello Anime loves and Otakus today we are getting into what I did with my sibling over the weekend. So its started to get cold with the change of the seasons because its becoming winter.  So my sibling and I choose to go skating in one of the skating arenas. It was fun we made sure to be early and get the good skates. We put on our stickers and hopped onto the ice. It was very fun other than how loud it was and the busyness on the ice it died down a couple hours later. But it was crazy how cold it was in the skating area like it was colder than it is when ice freezes on the lakes. I made sure to bring a jacket and put on long clothing but it was very chilly me and my sibling got cold. 
    Now the whole experience of leaving the house was such a haste I usually stay inside but they really wanted to go skating and like the good sibling I am I choose to take them to the rink. Now we had fun and loved skating around especially after everybody left because they got tired. We got to eat the shitty food and even got to watch a game that was going on in one of the other rinks. Our favorite food we ate was the popcorn with lots of butter, my siblings favorite was a hot tea. 
    The ice rink was  larger than the lakes we used to skate on. But their were so many gashes and large dents in the ice. How does one dent the ice like a couple centimeters deep. It was fun though. We skated around for a couple hours. After we got used to skating around it got less cold. 
    Over all I had fun other than it was sooooo busy like over 50 people on the rink and the little kids started to fall everywhere you had to be careful not to run into them. I'll give this experience skating a 7/10. We also got take away food. Very fun. 
    everybody clapping for my wonderful ice skating performance. 
  11. Otaku

    My downfall and twisted emotions on romance and other.

    By Otaku,


    Entry 4 - True Feelings
    Hello fellow anime loves and otakus, It's been a week since I choose to take a break and a lot has happened but I am bettering myself and trying to reconnect with others in RL to have easier times talking with friends. Please if you have any advice I would appreciate it.
    So on Thursday of last week I announced I would be taking a break due to health and academics. Which is true but a lot happened for it to get to that point. 
    On Tuesday I made a post to the blog about liking one of my classmates in a romantic way. My feeling I did not fully understand since I had never had a friend that close before. It was also influenced by my friends around me taking about their boyfriends and girlfriends, feeling left out I choose a person to like. I mean I had liked them as a friend so what would be any different. That was about 2 weeks ago when I made that choice. That's what drove us apart. 
    One day on Thursday of last week they pulled me out into the hallway with another friend saying they needed to discuss something with me. I obliged and joined the 2 of them in the hallway. They had told me that they had noticed my shift in behavior and said it was making them uncomfy that I "liked" them in a crush type of way knowing I had liked them since we first meant. Now I did never like them and stand by that to right now after thinking on it and discussing it. They finally asked the question if I did indeed like the in that way. I said no in the hallway and said I never would like them or force myself on them, I also said I would change my behaviors that suit the tile of friend. I felt like I told a lie in that hallway and a weight had been lifted off my chest. But now I realize it was not a lie I was saying how I felt and the weight of having a "crush" left my chest because of the burden it was to keep up the lie. 
    I am trying to better myself little by little making it easier to join society one day and step afoot outside the house when needed. This uncomfy situation made me realize how important having conversations with people is even though it can be awkward and not ideal. 
    Now I do still have problems at school expetally with others in my class and my "friends" at school but I'm trying to work that out by connecting with old friends to help improve communication and conversation. 
    Thanks for reading and if you have any advice please let me know I could use it. 
     this week has been hard but we power though with tears in our eyes.
  12. Otaku

    My romance life needs help!

    By Otaku,


    Entry 3 - Romance?
    Hello anime loves and otakus! Today we have a crisis if you have read the title todays topic is my romance life and it's a mess.
    Now as a shut in that still goes to school I had made some friends and joined a club to try and make some friends to discuss anime with. Now this year I made a friend that recommended me to watch "Death Note" so I watched it and gave them an update with screenshots of me watching it so we could discuss their favorite show. This is how it started. 
    Now here is where we are now:
    Our other 2 friends constantly say we would look good in a relationship because we like similar things and can talk easily. 
    We go out and hang out almost every week. 
    We hug and hold hands in the hallways and out side of school. 
    AND we tried dating before (for 1 day) but they said they where not ready. which is okay to have boundaries but LITARLY we are the exact same as before and I think we still have feelings for each other. Like I get it, it can be hard to be in a relationship you are not ready for but we are basically dating. 
    I don't know how I got in this Rom-Com anime-esk plot but please make it have a good ending. 
    Today they seemed less cheerfully then they usually are they said something about their phone but I could care less I just want to see them smiling again. No matter what I do I thought it would be easy to not think about them but every little thing reminds me of them. Even when I binge anime I think of them. Because of my past I did not think I could feel this way but I do and I don't know how to work through it because all I want to do right now is make them happy and I don't know how. I want to ask them about out relationship dynamic and see what we can do or when we could go to a café or a bookstore together but they keep saying they have plans. I don't know if it's because I'm taking up too much of their time or they don't like me anymore this has all happened within like the past month.
    I thought I would be okay with not being in a relationship with them but I don't know anymore, I don't even want to do anything all I want to do is hug them and call them mine, Like I'm shy about other things. Every time I'm near them I want to smile so hard my cheeks hurt. when we hold hands I get all nervous whist they seem so cool with it. I can't even do school work without thinking about them. I want to tell them how I feel but I'm scared to loose our friendship, its like a delicate rose waiting to be picked but it has thorns. 
    I don't know what to do guys, I thought maybe I would not feel this way anymore I have not in years. Please reply if you have advice to give about this or romance in general. Thanks for reading and I  promise I will post something on reviewing an anime I'm studying it right now. See you in the next one thanks for reading!
     This is how my heart feels. Fuwa Fuwa. 
  13. Otaku

    What life is like as a shut in going to school.

    By Otaku,


    Entry 2 - Shut in School life
    Hey guys todays post will be about my experience at high school and what my life is like:
    Every day I wake up at 5 and get read for school. I brush my hair, put on a t-shirt + pants + glasses, and brush my teeth
    I ride the bus to school so I try to sit close to the front since non of my friends live in my area.  I get to school and wait for one of my friends we typically get breakfast together. after that we meet up with 2 of my other friends. 
    I go to classes they are okay non of my friends take the same classes as me until later in the day. I go to lunch and eat with my friends. The studying aspect of school is not that bad for me because I sit in my room a lot, I don't really like when it takes away from watching anime or playing games. 
    My friends typically make fun of what anime's I watch, my appearance, and the light novels I read. I ask them to stop many times but they choose not too. They are nice friends and we will be starting a DnD campaign soon. 
    I typically don't like to go to school because I don't really like to leave the house. Going to the store is always a pain. Going to school is too there are too many people and its allways distracting to see people and hear people doing other things. They have rules about doing things like listening to music and being on your phone.  They also have these tiny desks and chairs that you have to fold into; they really make my knees hurt. 
    By definition I would classify myself as a shut in because I would rather stay in my room then leave the house and watch anime rather than hanging out with friends.  I do my best to interact with my friends but I worry alot about if I'm a bother so I try to stray away. 
    "Personality type - a person who is secretive, brooding, and withdrawn, and tends to avoid social contact." 
    Now sometimes If my friends would like to go out I do and I have fun but I whilst out I wish we could return to my house and spend time there. Hear me out I do like to go out with my friends when its not busy and it's just me and another person. I find it difficult to connect with a large group of people that why I choose to spend most of my time inside the house. 
    It also might be hard to hear a boy say this but I have always had low self esteem and no confidence. So a couple years ago for my first year of junior high I gained a friend that liked me they where an upperclassmen so they where about 1 grade level ahead of me and about 1-2 years older than me. We became friends with some other kids in their class forming a cute little friend group. Eventually we envied 2 of the boys I knew from my grade school class into the group. One of the boys watched anime so he introduced me to anime like High School DxD and Domestic Girlfriend. I found out the upperclassmen I became friends with liked me so we dated for a while, they introduced me to a lot of things and promised to do things with me, luckily we never got there. After we broke up over the summer (we where still friends due to there suggestion) they bullied me about using anime as an escape. So every time I opened my computer to watch anime they walked over and lectured me about an unhealthy obsession and closed the laptop.
    So after like a year with dealing with that I make new friends in my last year of junior high. I can only remember one she had the total personality of a tsundere which was probably a bad thing because one of my top 2 favorite character tropes is a tsundere. To put it lightly I was in love with her, which was okay because she totally played into it with not only play flirting but like holding my hand, egging me on, and resting her head on my shoulder. But the only problem was I was taking her meanness as sign she liked me. She told me to do some interesting things because I watched anime, I was the scum of the earth to her. She was my second reason why I have such low self esteem and consider my self a shut in and continue to watch anime.   
    My friends currently are a lot better than the hardships I faced so many years ago and I'm proud to call them my friends (most of the time). Today whist we were on lunch break we played a game of cards. 
    A lot of these experiences make me realize it's so much easier to stay home and be trapped in my room. But I always try to push through because of somebody I hold dear in my heart as cheesy as that sounds.  Being a shut in has made me realize how much anime is present in my life to say the least I watch on average 9.6hours of anime in a week.
    It has been taking longer, because I'm writing out next blog entry on an anime I'm thoroughly watching and doing research on the upbringing and documenting every important moment in the show for a full series review and recap. 
    Thanks so much for reading my fellow otakus and anime loves hope to see you in the next one!
     This is how we be feelin this week. Its Monday and I'm already tired and jumpy. lol
  14. Otaku

    Welcome to my blog the Anime Auxiliary

    By Otaku,


    Entry 1 - Introductions
    Hello and welcome my anime loves and fellow otakus, I’m Otaku an eccentric anime lover I have watched over hundreds of anime which I keep track of. This blog is for reviewing and discussing popular and not so known anime. We will also do polls on thoughts about controversial anime. I mostly watch a range of slice of life to ecchi.
    If you have an anime you would like to be watched and have a detailed review on please comment down below. Thanks for visiting the Anime Auxiliary and enjoy the stay.
      

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