Eva, Gurren Lagann, and my current existential crisis

[jmf6401]

I'm in the midst of an existential crisis and Evangelion and it's much frequently categorized sister series Gurren Lagann are at the center of it. Both feature two characters, Gendo and Simon respectively, who have similar situations. Both of them lose the love of their lives and both have the capability to bring them back though doing so would incur a great cost to the world. The difference is their reaction. Simon accepts it and tries to move on. Gendo on the other hand lets the loss consume him to the point that he forsakes everything for the chance to be reunited with his wife.

Here's my issue. Objectively I know Simon's actions are the correct ones to make but subjectively, I would probably follow Gendo's example. Like him, concepts like hate and despair are more "real" and easy for me to comprehend while love and hope seems more like an illusion. If I ever found someone who did give me the ability to actually understand love, and if I lost them but had the option to bring them back, I'd probably do so regardless of the cost to others. And I just don't know how to reconcile what I know is the correct action with my own personal desires.

Your thoughts?