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Do you have trouble making friends?


Steerminator

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I do personally find it hard to make friends, online and off-line. I have one good friend I play on Xbox Live with that I met through my cousin, but that's about it. I'm kind of awkward, so it can be difficult for me to make friends with people I don't know very well.

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I’m usually off in my own little world! Friends are a thing that happens by chance for me, seeing as how I don’t actively seek out friendship. I’m not lonely or anything, quite happy actually! I take it as it comes, fairly easy to please haha

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On 3/9/2019 at 11:00 AM, Kohloo said:

I’m usually off in my own little world! Friends are a thing that happens by chance for me, seeing as how I don’t actively seek out friendship. I’m not lonely or anything, quite happy actually! I take it as it comes, fairly easy to please haha

That is sort of how it has been for me lately. I mean I have a decent group of friends, and a dope as hell wifu though I need my me time too. 

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On 1/8/2019 at 3:22 PM, efaardvark said:

I've tried that a few times.  In fact, where I work it is kind of an occupational hazard.  Every eclipse or transit or whatever there's a crowd of people and telescopes in the mall down the hill from my office.  I even have a couple telescopes* myself, including a nice 8-inch CAT, with GOTO, GPS, wifi interface to my phone/computer, and more optics and accessories than I care to admit to.  :) 

The problem is that it has been hard to find such a group nearby where I don't know anyone from work.  I'm a fix-it guy at work, and socializing with work-friends always seems to wind up being about work.. specifically about getting me to fix something at work.  Or discussing how to fix something at work.  Or the best way to do something at work.  Etc.  Etc.  Don't get me wrong.  I'm happy to help in a work context, and I do enjoy my work.  (At least when it isn't making me crazy.)  But not so much that I want to give it my social life as well.  And yes, I've tried to make rules about not doing or discussing work outside of the office.  It doesn't really help.  I'm happy to discuss pretty much anything having to do with anything more than 100km up, but that's a slippery slope.  It seems at some point there's always a "Hey, that reminds me; I know you don't like discussing work but..." moment.  As a result I find I'd rather associate with non-work people, even if meeting such is difficult.

That said, for a while now I've also been looking for a good solar power group locally.  Maybe I could try that again.  I have solar panels on the roof and I'd like to find like-minded people to get together with and compare notes.  It is a lot easier & convenient to find people online though, especially with my work schedule.  Recently my boss even has/had me working shifts again.  Hard to find time for parties or club meetings when you'r'e working graveyard one day, then swings the next.  :(

 

*"Frangere" and "Cat"...

FrangereCat

 

Your work situation sounds just like my husband.. I'm always trying to get him to make new friends, it's just hard when you work all week and want to get things done at home on the weekends, it really doesn't leave much time for most working people to make friends outside of work. I try to get my friends with hubbies to have outings together.. so far we have a few game nights, so connecting is a possibility for him, but keeping up relationships Is a lot of work for anyone. Even myself, though I'm a stay at home mom, I find it hard to always be social, I'm more of a homebody. I love the feeling of coming on in front home after a long day out. So if I'm having an busy week, I'm less likely to want to see friends.

I came by my circle of friends pretty fortunately by connections with family. My sister in laws old best friend became a close friend of mine once I became a SAHM, due to her generosity and experience. Then my circle widened with other moms in the area.

My other close friend is my sisters boyfriends sister, and we met and just hit it off due to common interests when we threw my sister a baby shower 😁

The hardest thing for me is to keep friends, life changes tend to move me away from friends all the time, so I think of friends as changing with the seasons of life. We need funfriends when we are small, someone to stand by us when we are Learning and growing, and people to laugh with us and bring joy when we are on our own. One or two friends can't be all of the things that we need, so hopefully as life goes on we can make many.

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2 hours ago, Seshi said:

The hardest thing for me is to keep friends, life changes tend to move me away from friends all the time, so I think of friends as changing with the seasons of life. We need funfriends when we are small, someone to stand by us when we are Learning and growing, and people to laugh with us and bring joy when we are on our own. One or two friends can't be all of the things that we need, so hopefully as life goes on we can make many

I've had to deal with this for a long time.  I have a number of friends, but over the years pretty much all of them have moved away as the rising cost of living in S. Calif. forced them to relocate.  Several family members as well.  My neighbor of 15 years retired and moved to Oregon a couple years ago.  My last remaining high school friend in the area finally threw in the towel and moved to Arizona just last year.  Fortunately communications technology has allowed us to keep in touch and made that process less painful than it might have been in past eras, but Discord and email can only do so much.  It is getting harder and harder to meet new people too.  Everyone seems too busy trying to make ends meet to take time out for socializing.  I know I'm guilty of that.  And even when I'm not too busy, I'm too tired.  :(

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@efaardvark I really hope you can make some small changes here and there to better take care of yourself and your needs (aside from money).. that's an obvious need.

maybe find some way to recharge so you're not zapped all the time. Pick up a new hobby that keeps you active, because as strange as it sounds, the more active you are the more energy you have.

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