Welcome to the club. I've been single all my life and have never met a girl who wants me as their boyfriend. I get the same feelings as you when I watch some anime series, but I've come to the view that it's just not my lot in life to have a partner. I've learnt that single people can still have a lot of fun and can do things that married people can't. I have several hobbies and interests that can be enjoyed as a single person, although they would be nice to share with a partner. While I don't think there's much chance I'll find anyone now I haven't given up and still hope that one day I'll meet that special someone. In the meantime I'll just carry on enjoying the life I have.

This is certainly not to downplay either of your situations as I've had friends and colleagues in similar places in life as you both have described and it sounds doubly frustrating, however, the dating world (if you can even call it that) at this point in time is such a tragic mess that it really doesn't matter who you are it's going to be a frustrating and trying time. I have friends who are smart, attractive, successful in their fields, thoughtful, and all-around ideal potential mates, but the dating "culture" if you will has been trashed. Dating apps have sold you convenience but in reality it's an emotionless swiping nightmare of "finding your perfect someone", which has literally turned a potential mate into a product that matches your "needs and wants". Solid, happy, healthy relationships do not start like that. 

I could sit here and type out several paragraphs as to why I feel this way about the dating scene but to spare anyone I will simply say that I feel like @Animedragon has the right idea here. I would tell this to anyone regardless of their circumstances to slow down and relax as much as they possibly can. It's a hellish mess for everyone out there, and please don't get hung up by the people who can get a new boyfriend/girlfriend whenever they please, because odds are there are underlying extenuating circumstances as to why they can do that, and that's not the sort of thing you want to pursue. Also as Animedragon pointed out, there are, believe it or not, several perks to being single that can absolutely be embraced, and to try and be at least a little helpful I would suggest a personal type of exposure therapy. Maybe try finding a way to practice talking to people in general instead of going straight for a cute someone you like and turning the difficulty of the situation all the way to Expert. Start small and gain confidence in general every day conversations and then attempt the more challenging situations. 

well,, i know how it feels. i also strived to be in a committed relationship so much so I rushed myself into it. I promise there will be a right time.. please take your time. its rough out there, I know.

On 4/3/2025 at 9:04 PM, giuls said:

well,, i know how it feels. i also strived to be in a committed relationship so much so I rushed myself into it. I promise there will be a right time.. please take your time. its rough out there, I know.

Thank you.