my name is kameron and i’m 16. recently i’ve been looking where i’d be at in the future and it brung me to a reality of i’m going to go nowhere. i just feel like not being here anymore recently, i have the world’s greatest parents that always offer their support. i don’t like opening up to anyone i prefer texting over chat as it’s easier for me. i don’t care about myself, or try to fix myself, ihave no drive to do anything, i get up and go to my desk and be there all day, i rarely ever go out of my room. i don’t have the greatest hygiene either, my teeth are bad and don’t brush them all that often, same thing with showering. i take adderall for my adhd to help me focus “in class” even though it’s at home, i just don’t do it. people say i’m smart, i sometimes do, but with certain things, i never applied myself to school. coming off of it makes me feel like even more crap. making me even more depressed. i don’t eat all.. my mom came in and talked about school so i do work. i don’t eat healthy food, bad grades from not doing work. i really only drink soda for the most part. but when i take adderall i lose my appetite to eat as well as drink. i like taking the pill because i want to get skinnier/slimmer but it’s only hurting me even more. in 2018 first year of highschool i was depressed and went to self harm and i think about that sometimes but i don’t do it. i probably would’ve already been gone if i didn’t have such loving people in my life, i don’t want to hurt them..and i love them so much..i don’t have any drive to try to change i don’t know why or what’s wrong with me. i don’t tell anyone on how i feel inside, not my parents, siblings, friends, my girlfriend. i just want to get some help, of how to change and be better, i hate being sad like this.. i stay on my computer all day because to escape my shitty reality. i want to change, i have so many problems to deal with that i don’t know how. i just want to be normal and want to live and be happy. i have a short temper i over think and rush to conclusions and i don’t know what to do. i just need someone to help me, or where to begin. i don’t know anything, i just want to change.
please pm PM, or add my discord. ZeroTwo#0002
(if you add my discord youre gonna have to reply with your name on discord because i have a lot of friend requests)
(there’s so many things in my mind that keep popping up and i want to add it.)
(re-reading this and my adhd is showing with all the “i” statements and jumping all over from topic-to-topic)
(at the time of writing this i’m in a call with my girlfriend, coming up on 7 months and i’m currently muted writing this, and didn’t tell her and don’t want to unmute as i don’t want to make her sad because of me crying.)