XII360

So allota sh*t happened, both good, both bad news

Ill start of with bad news so i can end stuff in good news

Dewa dewa, hajimemashokaaaa ╰(*°▽°*)╯

Bad news (may or may not be rant ?)

1.) My pc is slowish and needs upgrade, but i wont be upgrading it until after i pass board examination (which is scheduled at march 18th and 19th, if im not mistaken

2.) I lost a really close friend (who i treated as a senpai) couse i sortaaaaaa fell inlove with her, and then she rejected me (big surprise there kiddo), we haven't talked since, and well, if things keep up, i guess im not going to cosmania (couse i initially bought ticket, since she invited me, but, i cant go there if she hates me, ill feel too wierd, so unless we be friends again, im cancelling, and most likely burning the tickets if it passes deadline of cosmania (28th and 29th)

After losing a friend, i semi became depressed, welllllll

i always had semi depression, but it has now escalated to the point where, when i think about it, i cut my own hands, but not feel any of the pain, i-ts pretty emo

But, i feel its a way of atonement for the stupidity i did, begging is the lowest of the low a person can go, and i feel until we be friends again, doing such stupid acts will be a fine ass atonement (but im sure ill stop someday even if we aint gonna be friends again xD)

Also yea, i know, its stupid, (especially knowing IM IN THE MEDICAL FIELD ?!?!) if i wanted to kill mah self, id aim for vital organs, or the artery to bleed out, wont lie, i have imaginations of wanting to experience it, but i stop mah self couse, it aint gonna be atonement if i fawken game over myself 

4.) I also HAD a hallucination

It started when i cutted muhself, i could see blood clearly in walls and stuff; but after a few days, the hallucinations disappeared after 2-4days (day one it was clear, day 3 it was minor, day 4 i could faintly see them, and 5th i could no longer see them)

I had a similar problem in the past (hallucinations), but it wasn't blood, rather, it was minecraft blocks, i termed it *MC syndrome*, i had the urge to punch walls couse i could see everything as blocks, and my mind kept telling me if i punch trees or walls repeatedly BLOCKS WOULD FALL

but, the same as blood syndrome hallucination, MC synd. Went byebye in 2-4 days

So in conclusion, i am hella prone to hallucinogens, holy crap >.>

5.) I have stopped playing games (even mobile games) to focus on studying, and only turn them on if i have nothing to do and cant study (e.g outside), but most of the time, its reading a manga now, currently reading nozaki-kun mango xD)

THATS ALL THE BAD NEWS, YAAAAY ꉂ(ˊᗜˋ*)

Now onwards to good news

I only have a few as opposed to the bad news

1.) My scores so far in the review center is high (its not the same as when i first started, being 50/200 or 80/200, so far my scores have been pretty nice being 100/150, 60/100, or 143?/200

But the tests so far was minors (CM and MTLAWS), they aint 75%, but they are higher than my old exam scores, im also able to catch up and answer question the professor says

ヽ（≧□≦）ノو

2.) We changed internet providors, and our internet speed is now 80mbps dl speed, and 80mbps upload speed (shimakaze says; *OSOIIIII*, i say HAYAII DESU WA NE ?!?!)

3.) I got a new phone, i gave my s7active to my dad couse he wanted it, but mom bought me a brand new note10+ as an early x-mas gift (andholysh*t i love this phone, ITS LAGLESS SO FAR ON ANYTHING I DO, EVEN FGO ISNT LAGGING, EVEN AF IS LAG FREE HOLYCRAP

AND THE STYLUS, I LOVE THE STYLUSSSSS OH MY GOD I FEEL LIKE A WIZARD WHEN I WAVE THIS SH*T AROUND AND PHONE REACTS

ehem, anways, mom was suppose to give me ipad air 3, but i told her, i cant use an ipad air 3, how do i use something so big ? I DONT EVEN APPLE PRODUCT

So thats why she bought me a n10+ >.>

In the end, the ipad was given to my dad (where he will watch movies at, and his overjoyed at it

And my brother was give a s9 (which was my moms old phone) 

My mom went and bought a s10, thats why she gave her s9 to my brother

And yea, dazaboutit

Gonna donate blood tomorrow, ill post a pic about it tomorrow

Im semi-back guiz ( •̀ᄇ• ́)ﻭ✧

(Still more focused on studies tho, but browsing af aint a pain couse of lagless fone xD)