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Post some dad jokes


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On 1/15/2023 at 7:37 AM, animechat said:

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Philippe Flop.

The French are so hardcore they eat pain for breakfast!

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Daughter: I have a lot of friends named Nathan. There’s Nathan Miller, Nathan Radcliff, Nathan Lewis… Me: When they are together, do you call them the United Nathans?

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28 minutes ago, animechat said:

I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.

‘Give us back our eleven days!’

(The English calendar riots of 1752. (Which may be just an urban myth and never actually happened))

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I was going to watch The Last of Us, but I never saw The First of Us and thought I might get lost.

Why is it impossible to starve to death in the desert? Because of all the sand which is around us.

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4 hours ago, efaardvark said:

Did you know that milk is one of the fastest liquids on Earth?

It's past your eyes before you even see it.

Where's the GROAN emoji when you need it?? 🙂

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One turned to the other and said, "Wow, it’s pretty hot in here!"

The other one shouted, "Wow, a talking muffin!"

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I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him.

That's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

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7 hours ago, Animedragon said:

I'm sure you will Excel in your quest. 🙂

Oh, hold on a second! I need to make OneNote before I embark.

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2 minutes ago, Animedragon said:

That will definitely improve your Outlook on the case. 🙂

Alas, I'm still trying to get into the Groove of things. 😁

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If the early bird gets the worm, I'll sleep in until there are pancakes.

 

What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business.

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