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How are you feeling right now?


Kiriness

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Feeling like screaming as loud as I can as a release. I don't want cops showing up though because a neighbor called in a domestic disturbance, so, I'll refrain from doing that. Wouldn't do me any good anyway. It always gets me in some other trouble. Time to vicariously destroy things in Front Mission 1st Remake, like I've been doing all day. Oh, other than feeling like screaming though I feel like breaking something. I'm doing my best to keep it together though. All breaking something would do is cause damage that we'd either have to fix or replace when the finances could be better used in other areas.

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Relaxed as I had no work today I was able to sleep in and have a slow day doing things I needed to get done. 

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Big sis' has been on my mind a lot lately, so that makes me sad when I think about it too much. Other than that, I'm keeping myself calm and cool for now. Hopefully it lasts though.

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I have a massive migraine and I'm not feeling very great. Migraines are pretty common with me. I'm about to just finish eating my dinner, get off the computer, and go to bed. 

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9 hours ago, Zeref said:

Good and certainly glad the weekend is here.

YESSS BUT THERE IS SO MUCH PACKING TO DO ~! It has me a little stressed. 

We are moving next Saturday and I want to finish getting everything done this weekend. Even though most things are packed away I'm the type of person that still has anxiety until the last bit is done x.x 

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I feel paranoid and I'm trying to keep myself from externalizing my anger towards something, which is getting harder and harder to do lately since I've been internalizing anger and frustration my whole life. Aside from that, I'm trying to chill out to some Collide right now which is helping. It's a relaxing kind of sound to listen to music-wise. If I don't at least write about it in here I'll burst, so it helps to type it out in here.

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18 hours ago, Forlorn said:

I feel paranoid and I'm trying to keep myself from externalizing my anger towards something, which is getting harder and harder to do lately since I've been internalizing anger and frustration my whole life. Aside from that, I'm trying to chill out to some Collide right now which is helping. It's a relaxing kind of sound to listen to music-wise. If I don't at least write about it in here I'll burst, so it helps to type it out in here.

Hope you are feeling a little better today. 

I'm having a pretty chill day. Relaxing, playing games, doing a little packing with @Sakura.

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2 hours ago, Zeref said:

Hope you are feeling a little better today. 

I'm having a pretty chill day. Relaxing, playing games, doing a little packing with @Sakura.

Thank you. I do feel better, but I'm still not in a as good of a mood as I usually am.  It'll most likely pass though and I'll be my regular self again soon because I always, sooner or later, revert back to my usual, happy, laughy self given enough time. I appreciate you saying that. ^^

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6 hours ago, Zeref said:

Hope you are feeling a little better today. 

I'm having a pretty chill day. Relaxing, playing games, doing a little packing with @Sakura.

You just being cool about it with me in the corner panicking and making lists of things left to do lol ~
I did have a pretty good day though. Family came over around lunch time to hang out since I will be moving soon, kinda a last weekend hang out thing. 

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I slept in until almost noon which is a great feeling on the last day of the weekend. I feel well rested and relaxed. 

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Got to sleep in a bit too, finished packing, did some cleaning, felt pretty good about everything I got done and I think I have enough done now where I won't stress out about it anymore. 

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For some reason, today started out as a depressing day. I guess because I can no longer determine the real people's voices from the voices that only I hear anymore. It's not exactly an uplifting feeling... There's no escaping them either, even when I'm by myself I hear them. Sometimes I even hear them in my dreams... Anyway, that's why today's depressing. Tomorrow will probably be no different either, even with my medications.

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I injured my arm somehow by overworking it and now I have to wear a brace on it. Somehow fluid got built up in the joint area where my arm bends. I'm assuming from all the packing and heavy lifting I've been doing over the past month with this move coming up x.x My arm has just been feeling constantly in pain the past week even when I'm not moving it. I'm trying out ice packs and the doctor gave me some pain meds but nothing is really helping yet and I can't really slow down until after the move. 

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5 hours ago, Sakura said:

I injured my arm somehow by overworking it and now I have to wear a brace on it. Somehow fluid got built up in the joint area where my arm bends. I'm assuming from all the packing and heavy lifting I've been doing over the past month with this move coming up x.x My arm has just been feeling constantly in pain the past week even when I'm not moving it. I'm trying out ice packs and the doctor gave me some pain meds but nothing is really helping yet and I can't really slow down until after the move. 

I hope your arm returns to normal soon. Pain always sucks to have to endure.

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18 hours ago, Forlorn said:

I hope your arm returns to normal soon. Pain always sucks to have to endure.

I've been trying to not use it today and it does feel a little better. I've been avoiding a lot of typing or using it to pick things up. 

 

9 hours ago, Zeref said:

I think I caught your stress @Sakura because now I am starting to feel some anxiety and stress over Saturday. 

Noooooo it's the worst feeling x.x

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Better today because my anxiety is gone. Just a small moment of it is normal before a big event right? 😅
I went to workout this afternoon and that helped me to feel a lot better. 

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9 hours ago, Zeref said:

Feeling good about the fact that I think we have everything packed and ready to go for our move.

I hope everything goes smoothly with the move and you don't have any last minute problems.

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11 hours ago, Animedragon said:

I hope everything goes smoothly with the move and you don't have any last minute problems.

Thank you. That's what I'm hoping too. Something always seems to go wrong when moving. We are loading the car up this evening so we can get on the road following the movers early tomorrow morning. My only big worry is the traffic. 

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A mixture of disappointment and relief because I heard mom saying something dismissive and demeaning towards me only to look at her to find out that her mouth was closed and her lips weren't even moving. The thing about it though was I kept hearing it as I was looking at her when her mouth wasn't even moving... so, I clearly can't trust what I hear at all. I just need to stop letting what I hear get to me so much because  the probability of someone actually saying something negative about me and me being able to hear it is incredibly low. I just wish I'd have had this epiphany sooner before I retaliated to what I was hearing with verbal nastiness of my own... I really don't know how my family and friends put up with me at all. The patience it takes to do so is more than I thought it was... I'm doing my very best to try not to let it get me down though. It's what the voices most likely want since they push my buttons so frequently. So, I'm trying to be in a good mood today. The revelation today though did help me finally start to ignore (or at least not respond) to what I think I hear, so I guess that's the silver lining, but even so... I wish I would've realized that much, much sooner...

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Ready for tomorrow and moving to a new state! I'm looking forward to the new experience. 

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